Chapter 25: Searching for Completion
**Benard Walter’s Perspective**
It was late at night, and I was seated at my desk drowning in documents that I had failed to address during the day. The workload had become a mountain, and even Rhode, my Beta, couldn’t resist the pull of exhaustion. His head nodded sleepily, and I finally told him to go home and rest. He had been working just as hard as I had–training soldiers during the day and assisting me with administrative duties at night. Rhode’s loyalty never ceased to amaze
- me.
I couldn’t have chosen a better Beta. Rhode was like a machine, executing tasks with precision, day after day, no matter how monotonous or taxing. While the rest of the pack grumbled under the weight of their responsibilities, Rhode remained steadfast, unflinching. In that sense, we were alike.
For me, the motivation came from a deep sense of responsibility and an unwavering desire to protect our pack. This was my family, my people, and I would shoulder any burden to ensure their safety and prosperity. No one else could fulfill this duty–it was mine and mine alone.
Yet, in my pursuit of strength and stability for the pack, I had started to lose a part of myself. My emotions had dulled over time, and nothing seemed to spark joy or satisfaction anymore. I had become more like a machine, operating on duty and habit, devoid of spontaneity or feeling. In exchange, I had fortified the pack and honed our warriors into an indomitable force. It was a trade–off I could live with.
But complacency was not an option. I knew that danger always lurked on the horizon. Our peaceful life could shatter at any moment, and it was my responsibility to ensure that never happened. Strength was our only safeguard. Protecting the pack was a lifelong mission, and the stakes were far too high to relax, even for a moment.
As these thoughts consumed me, I heard footsteps approaching.
I didn’t bother looking up. Whoever it was, I wasn’t in the mood for interruptions–especially
if it was my parents.
“I never imagined my son would turn into such a workaholic,” my mother said, her voice soft
but laced with concern.
“It’s not that late, Mom. I’ll be home soon,” I replied without meeting her eyes, keeping my focus on the unending pile of paperwork.
“It’s already midnight, Benard,” my father chimed in. “You’ll see the sun rise if you keep this up. I know you want the best for the pack, but you need to give yourself some, grace. This kind of pressure will break you.
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His words made me glance at the heap of documents in front of me. Time had slipped away
without my noticing. I hadn’t achieved nearly as much as I’d intended, and the frustration gnawed at me.
“I should have finished all of this today,” I muttered bitterly. “There’s still so much left. I feel like I didn’t accomplish anything.”
My father placed a reassuring hand on my shoulder. “You’re doing more than enough. But you need rest, son. The work will always be there, no matter how late you stay up. Don’t drive yourself into the ground.”
My mother moved behind me and began to massage my tense shoulders. Her touch was gentle, and I felt a small wave of relief wash over me. “Your father is right, Benard. You’ve worked so hard. Please don’t push yourself too far.”
I couldn’t understand how my father had managed to balance everything so effortlessly during his time as Alpha. Every task seemed monumental to me, every issue riddled with complexities. Even during training sessions, the soldiers grumbled about the intensity and pressure I placed on them.
I had overheard some whispering behind my back, comparing me unfavorably to my father. They claimed my methods lacked his finesse, that I wasn’t as capable or decisive.
The criticism stung, even though I tried not to show it. I was desperate to prove them wrong, to prove to myself that I was worthy of leading this pack. But the more I tried, the more I felt like a flailing child rather than a confident Alpha.
The weight of the pack’s future pressed heavily on my shoulders, and it seemed impossible to carry it as gracefully as my father had.
“Father,” I said, my voice low and weary, “I don’t think I’ll ever measure up to you. How did you manage everything so perfectly?”
He smiled, his gaze warm and understanding. “You’re already doing a remarkable job, Benard. There’s no need to compare yourself to anyone, not even me. You’ve always been a source of pride for your mother and me.”
“I used to feel just as overwhelmed,” he continued. “But then I met your mother. She was my anchor, my partner. She helped me navigate the storm.”
My mother nodded. “You need someone to share the load, Benard. Perhaps it’s time to find your mate. A true partner can make all the difference.”
Her words struck a nerve. Exhausted as I was, the mention of a mate jolted me awake.
“I hope you’ve already met her,” my father added. “If not, we might need to search for her in other packs.”
The idea of finding my mate had always been a sensitive subject for me. It wasn’t that I didn’t want to meet her–I did. But the very mention of a mate stirred memories I wished I could! bury forever.
Chop 25 Searching for Completion
3.3
The Moon Goddess had yet to bless me with a mate, or at least, that was what everyone believed. The truth was far more complicated.
There was a night, long ago, that I could never forget. It was a night shrouded in secrets and pain, a night that left me haunted. Only two people knew what had happened, and one of them was no longer alive.
The other person was me, and I bore the weight of that secret alone.
Since that night, Thelma’s name had become a ghost–a phantom that lingered in the shadows of my mind. Though her name was rarely spoken aloud, it echoed in my thoughts, accompanied by a chill that seeped into my bones
Even now, the memory made me break out in a cold sweat. No one else knew the truth, and I intended to keep it that way.
My parents‘ conversation about my mate continued, but their words barely registered. My mind was lost in the past, grappling with emotions I had tried to suppress. The pack’s future was my responsibility, but how could I lead them when I was still haunted by the past?
The room felt suffocating, the weight of my burdens pressing down harder than ever. Yet, even as doubt and regret swirled within me, I knew I couldn’t falter. The pack depended on me, and I would not let them down.
Perhaps finding my mate was the answer. Perhaps she could be the light that broke through my darkness. Or perhaps, I was destined to walk this path alone, carrying my secrets with me until the end.
Chapter 26: A Fragile Fote
Chapter 26: A Fragile Fate